Not-So-Secret Advice for New Mums

There's one thing you'll notice when you become pregnant or a new mum...everyone around you seems to become an expert on how you should parent your new bundle of joy. Whether you are a soon-to-be mum or a new mum, trying to take in lots of advice can become quite overwhelming and daunting, to say the least. But there are also things about motherhood that mums eventually wish someone told them.

Recently on a Mum & Bubs Facebook page, Mothers with 2 or 3+ children were asked to share their not-so-secret advice and tips for new mums and with their permission, I get to share it with YOU! Enjoy!

"Relax and breathe. Take every moment as it comes and don't stress if everything is not going the way it 'should'. Sleep when baby is sleeping, forget about the piles of washing and treasure every moment. It goes by faster than you realise!" (Shaz)

"Do what you have to do, don't stress about the 'right' way to do things. So-called 'bad habits' can be changed. Use your support people (partner, family etc). Don't feel that you have to be Super Mum and don't pretend things are great if they aren't. We all know how hard it can be sometimes. And my golden rule - a nap wins out over housework every time!" (Gina)

"Receiving help isn't a sign of failure. All the 'good advice' means nothing if it doesn't suit your family. Don't sweat the small stuff. Your partner/husband wants to help...let them, even if you think they don't do it right. Sleep when you can." (Sarah)

"Don't be too proud or shy to tell people to do washing, dinner, mow lawns, garden etc." (Ren)

"Go with the flow. Do what's right and works for you...enjoy the cuddles and them being little. You can't get it back!" (Clare)

"Sleep when baby does! Housework CAN wait. Ask for help!" (Kelsie)

"As a Mum, you learn something new every day. No Mum is perfect" (Tarnz)

"Happy Mama, Happy Bubba. Always do what you feel is right for you and your baby. Definitely treasure each moment - it goes fast! " (Chiara)

"Don't be too proud to ask for practical help." (Silvia)

"Treasure every minute, there's nothing like your first baby. And try not to listen too much to all the advice you're given, just do what works for you..." (Jasmine)

Treasure every moment!
"Don't feel bad or guilty doing things your own way, even if your wise and experienced mother or nana, keep telling you how to do things. No one knows your child like you do, your personal beliefs, comfort zone and mothers intuition will be the best guide. No child is the same, so don't compare your child's development to another. If you do, it's like you're unintentionally putting pressure on the baby to progress faster. And sleep as much are you can because you never know when your kid will put an all-nighter". (Bianca) 

"Do what's right for you family, if you want to bottle feed, then do it. Don't worry what others say."

"Try not to freak out" (Emma)

"Relax and don't listen to all the advice from others (lol). Everyone will have something to say about something but do what feels right for YOU." (Mellissa)

"Take each day as it comes. Some will be worse than others. Remember to spend individual time with your other kids. And enjoy them while they are little..." (Katherine)

"Always have chilled wine in the fridge" (Helen)

"Don't sweat the small stuff and your older kids can be great helpers. If its not working...start again." (Amanda)

"...I have twin 16 month olds, maybe different to singles but you can't give in and never rock a baby to sleep because you will still be doing it when number 2 comes" (Tash)

"They are only little for a short time - everything is a phase and it will get better...Just think 'this too will pass'"! (Jane)

"...Just relax and stay in tune with your children they can usually teach you a lot more than a book can. Don't take on everyone's advice because we are all different and so are our children. If something works for you then do it. Relax and love them, you can't go wrong. And always ask for help if you need it". (Amber)

"Spend individual time with older kids...even if it's just a story - uninterrupted is so valuable". (Lauren)

"When incorporating change into your babies routine, perserverance is the key! Sleeping, eating, discipline etc keep going, don't give up, children adapt easily so try and set routines that work for you". (Carly)

"I only have 1, but my advice would be: add 2 weeks to your due date when you tell people! Mine was 2 weeks late and so many people asked what I was waiting for...Like I wanted to wait even longer than the 40 weeks to meet this treasure!!!" (Miranda)

And my advice to new mums:
Give yourself a pat on the back every so often - Here's a virtual High 5! 
You're doing a great job Mama! 

What's one piece of not-so-secret advice you would share with a new mum? 

***A special Thank You to all the mothers that shared their not-so-secret advice and tips for new mums. You are all fabulous!


  1. Excellent post, Charlene! :) And truly great advice from all that you included! Every single child is unique and no one knows this better than their mother. I agree with all that everyone wrote. Stay rested Moms and follow your instincts. I'm so glad you shared with wonderful post, Charlene - so happy that you're part of One Word! Thank you! :)

    1. Thank you, Marcia :) I enjoyed putting this blogpost together, and hopefully it will help new mums that read it! I really enjoy being a part of the One Word Community! I am glad it has become a regular link up :)

  2. I love this and as a former new mom twice, you summed it up pretty perfectly and beautifully to me, especially your own piece of advice at the end, too! ;)

    1. Thank you Janine. Credit goes to the mums that contributed their advice. As for my own advice - it's important to be proud of yourself as a mama and remind yourself that you are doing a great job! Something I didn't do with my first.

  3. All great advice! My biggest piece of advice is always to trust your gut - nobody know your baby like YOU know your baby! :-)

  4. Yep everyone wants to give you their pearls of wisdom when you become a mum, even when you're pregnant. My sister in law just had a baby on Wednesday and I've actually been very mindful of not over sharing any advice. For example for her baby shower I didn't say a word about items she selected for her baby gift registry. A lot of mums asked me on the day why no one helped cull her list as a lot of items were either repeats or items that no mum really needs/uses. I said I remember everyone was telling me what I did or did not need, and it was making me doubt myself for thinking I needed it and just caused unnecessary stress - something an excited first mother shouldn't be feeling.

    I think my advice would be. Don't listen to any unless you've asked for it and don't be afraid to ask for help.

  5. So true Camielle - Congrats to your SIL. I am also mindful of what advice I give. And will only really give it if im asked. Everyone's experiences are different, its a matter of finding out what works for you.

  6. I love this! And you are right, people all become experts once you have a kid. Every kid is different and I think people sometimes forget that.

    1. I think we are all guilty of this (on a range of topics) at some stage in our lives. Thanks for commenting Tiffany!


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